Dear Mr. President

Oh my, oh my  I wish you had consulted me before you invited the Russians over. I know you wanted them to see you in the Oval Office but they already knew you were the president.

It is said that you have leaked confidential information to the Russians. At this point I would say you need to point out it is not confidential now because everyone knows.

The Washington Post leaked the information. It is no secret they do not like you. At this point I do not know what you can do now. I would not depend on the FBI for any help. They do not like you either. If you can think of any government Department that likes you maybe this would help. I have tried to think of one but I do not know any that like you. I would like to say definitely no tweeting.

There doesn't seem to be a lot of support for you in the Republican party right now. I do not think it would be a good idea to try to switch to the Democratic party at this time if you have been thinking about that.

The only thing I can think of to get the heat off of you right now is if someone very important died. This would probably give the press something new to talk about. I do not think it would be a good idea to call the Russians and suggest something about that though. I imagine they're watching them  very closely  right now too.

You remember the big scandal with the guy named Billy where you said that about grabbing women in certain places. Now if something were to happen to him this might bring that up again which would put you in a better light than what you're in right now. Or perhaps if you could get another woman to come forth and say that you took advantage of her and raped her that would be better than the media coverage you're getting right now.

I do not think it would work for you to go on national television and State ....I did not have relations with those Russians..... Remember Clinton tried to use that line once and it did not work out so well. The Russians may have a recording I wouldn't doubt that.

You could go on television and point to yourself and say you're fired. That line has worked well for you apparently in the past. But now I guess you don't want to fire yourself. But please don't use that line on anyone else right now. After all we saw that did not work on Comey.

Do you have any pull with anyone in the weather Department. A big hurricane or national disaster would probably help right now.

Please do not release your income tax is at this time showing you and the Russians have had a long-standing relationship even before you became president. Letting that come out would not be to your advantage.

I guess my best advice is just keep saying fake news, fake news, fake news. And remember no tweeting.